Sunday Song

I've been slacking this week with updating... sorry to all you loyal followers. Hahaha.


Anyway, I have been thinking about a lot, and couldn't decide what to post about, so that is why I have not posted in a while. Plus, I have a 9 1/2 month old son who is in EVERYTHING and I cannot take my eyes off him for even a second without him stuffing something inedible in his mouth.


Ok so this is one of my favorite songs of all time. I love the lyrics.



"Many men will drink the rain 
And turn to thank the clouds 
Many men will hear You speak 
But they will never turn around 

I will not forget You are my God, my King 
And with a thankful heart I bring my offering 
And my sacrifice is not what You can give 
But what I alone can give to you 

A grateful heart I give, A thankful prayer I pray, 
A wild dance I dance before you 
A loud song I sing, A huge bell I ring, 
A life of praise I live before You 

Many men will pour their gold 
And serve a thing that shines 
Many men will read your words 
But they will never change their minds"





The best version (in my opinion) is by waterdeep on their CD "Enter the Worship Circle"... and I cannot find it online ANYWHERE to post it.


So here is a totally different song for today. Its beautiful and brings me to tears almost every time I reflect on the lyrics. 

This one is called "At the Foot of the Cross"

Happy Sunday!

I think maybe every Sunday I will make it a point to post a worship song. Hillsong United is easily my favorite band. What I like most is their lyrics are very Bible based. You can almost always recognize the verses they use for inspiration in all of their songs. Love it. 
And if you are anything like me, you might like to read the lyrics before listening to the actual song. Here they are!

Tear down the walls see the world

Is there something we have missed

Turn from ourselves

Look beyond

There is so much more than this

And I don't need to see it to believe it

I don't need to see it to believe it

Cause I can't shake this

Fire deep inside my heart

Look to the skies hope arise

See His majesty revealed

More than this life there is love

There is hope and this is real

Cause I don't need to see it to believe it

I don't need to see it to believe it

Cause I can't shake this fire burning

Deep inside my heart

This life is Yours and hope is rising

As Your glory floods our hearts

Let love tear down these walls

That all creation would

Come back to You

It's all for You

Your Name is glorious

Glorious

Your love is changing us

Calling us

To worship in spirit and in truth

As all creation returns to You

For all the sons and daughters

Who are walking in the darkness

You are calling us to lead them back to You

We will see Your spirit rising

As the lost come out of hiding

Every heart will see this hope we have in You

Almost Unbelievable

So, I have decided to make the most of my awesome chronological Bible and actually journey through it front to back. Every time I pick up my Bible  I always have that internal "what should I read" conversation with myself... and this will totally eliminate that. The million other times I attempted to do this, I always gave up somewhere between Leviticus and Deuteronomy. I am amazed that it was ever common for people  to memorize the entire Torah. 


Anyway, as I started to read Genesis, I started to become irritated with myself. Can something so unbelievable really be true? Let me say that I am as fundamentalist as they come. I take the Bible literally. I believe that when it says God created everything in 6 days, it was 6 actual days. Yeah go ahead and snicker, laugh, throw rocks, I don't really care. It's an unpopular view even among Christians, and I'm used to people thinking I'm an idiot. But, I believe the Bible. Not just the parts I like & not just the parts that are plausible. The whole thing. So when the Bible says that the sun setting concludes each day of creation, I take that literally. (just a side note: www.answersingenesis.com is a great website full of resources and evidence that support this view.)


Reading through it yet again today, it struck me how truly amazing the story is. God created the heavens and the earth. He conceived and created every single living thing we see around us along with the land, water, sky, sun, moon, stars, EVERYTHING! How incredible. No wonder the Bible says that one only needs to look at God's creation to know of His existence. My mind could not fathom the greatness of God. So much so, that doubt started to creep into my heart. 


So I'm staring at Genesis chapter 2, wide eyed and mind boggled when a Nichole Nordeman song popped in to my head. Some of the lyrics being::


"Am I too wise to recognize that everything uncertain 
is certainly a possibility?
When logic fails my reasoning 
and science crushes underneath  
The weight of all that is unseen
Help me believe cause I don't want to miss any miracles
Maybe I'll see much better by closing my eyes..."


Yep. Thank you once again Nichole, for putting words to my seemingly inexpressible emotions. And thank you God, for once again confirming how amazing You are. It is almost unbelievable.

Devotionals, Quiet time, etc.

My husband and I were talking and he asked me: "I know you are really busy with the baby, do you get to have quiet time with God every day?" I shuttered inside, but probably not for the reason you think. In reality I DO get to read and pray every day, and 9 times out of 10, I take advantage of that time. I just hate the term "quiet time".  I am not sure why I am so bothered by it. Not only that, but I have a real issue with the concept of "daily devotionals" that many Christians rely on to focus their day on God.  I am in no way saying that people who do these things are wrong in any way!!!! These are great things to engage in in order to help deepen your relationship with God. I am just exploring my own feelings on the subject, and trying to get to the root of the reason why i cringe inside when people mention "quiet time". 

I think it is because to me, it puts things in a box. If I rely on daily "quiet time" to relate to God, then what happens when the baby screams all day and it is just never quiet??? I fail, and my relationship with God cannot and does not deepen. Instead a better goal would be to relate to God in every thing that I do, in every situation I am in, regardless of whether or not i am able to escape for a bit in to a moment or two of silence and solitude? Isn't this a bit more biblical too? David says in psalms 1:

"Blessed is the man
       who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked
       or stand in the way of sinners
       or sit in the seat of mockers. But his delight is in the law of the LORD,
       and on his law he meditates day and night."


To me, "meditating night and day" means constant thought. On top of that, Paul says to pray without ceasing many times in the new testament. 


So I think that is what the deal is. I just do not want to become someone who relies solely on daily quiet time or devotionals to deepen my relationship with God when the Bible says to acknowledge and follow God in each and every area of my life. That is much more difficult for me to do, than to pray for a half hour and call it a day. I have found that for me, it is so easy to slip in to a routine and become so comfortable in it, it becomes nothing more than a ritual. Stale religion results soon after... and all of a sudden, my lips are praising God but my heart is far from Him. I know I am so prone to this behavior that I shy away from anything that could lead me down that road. Probably to a fault.


So I guess in my opinion quiet time and devotionals are cool, as long as it is in addition to the constant fellowship I should be having with the Lord, 24/7/365.


Phew. Glad I got to the bottom of that weird reaction I have whenever I here those terms! :)

Hagar and Humility

God has really been teaching me about pride and humility. One comes so naturally and invades every aspect of your being, while the latter is unnatural and difficult to practice. 
Here are a few things the Bible says about humility:

"When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom." ~Proverbs 11:2

"Seek the LORD, all you humble of the land, you who do what he commands. Seek righteousness, seek humility; perhaps you will be sheltered on the day of the LORD's anger."

~Zepheniah 2:3

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves. Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others."

~Philippians 2:3-4

Keeping that in mind, here is an overview of the story of Hagar/Sarah/Abraham. God told Abraham he was going to bless him with a son, and make him the father of many nations. Abraham was old. Really old. It was unbelievable to think he and his wife would be able to conceive a son together. Sarah told Abraham to take her maidservant Hagar, as a concubine in hopes she would be able to give him a son. Abraham agreed to this (kind of important to note that this was not how God said things would happen, so in essence this plan was hatched out of doubt). When Hagar DID get pregnant, Sarah got angry and jealous. She then blamed Abraham for listening to her in the first place. Sarah mistreated Hagar, and Hagar ran away. 

So let's look at things from Hagar's perspective. At the wish of Sarah who was unable to conceive a child, she slept with Abraham. When she got pregnant, I suspect it gave her a sense of pride. The Bible says that she began to treat Sarah with contempt. After all, she was able to give Abraham something his own wife was unable to give him. All of a sudden, this person who was supposed to serve Sarah felt as if she was better than her. This (probably among other things) made Sarah very angry, & she mistreated her.  Then, this is what the Bible says:

"The angel of the LORD found Hagar near a spring in the desert; it was the spring that is beside the road to Shur. And he said, "Hagar, servant of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?" 

      "I'm running away from my mistress Sarai," she answered.

 Then the angel of the LORD told her, "Go back to your mistress and submit to her." The angel added, "I will so increase your descendants that they will be too numerous to count."

So there is Hagar, alone and pregnant in the desert. She is angry. She is so angry that she left her source of food, and shelter (for her and her unborn child) and ran away to the desert. She did not have a place to go, she did not have a plan, and it was likely she would have died in the desert. 

But God met her there. He told her to go back to Sarah, and submit to her. He told her there was a plan for her life, and a plan for her child's life. 

When I first read this last night, my question was... why would God tell Hagar to go back to Sarah, especially considering that after Sarah gives birth to Isaac, she ends up sending Hagar and Ishmael away anyway? I think the answer is humility. Sarah was not right in mistreating Hagar, but Hagar was wrong to treat Sarah with contempt after becoming pregnant. She allowed pride to rule her emotions, which caused her to put herself and her child in danger.  Pride can make us do some crazy things. I wonder if Sarah would have continued to mistreat Hagar if she apologized for her attitude and submitted to her instead? 

Sometimes we complain about our unfair circumstances when in reality, an ego check is in order. Why do we think we deserve so much? Why do we hold others to a standard that we ourselves cannot obtain apart from the help of God Himself? 

I think it is so beautiful when Hagar says : "You are the God who sees me," for she said, "I have now seen the One who sees me."

How beautiful it is to serve a God who bends down on our level to truly see us? Through our tears, our pride, our anger, our frustration, and our sin. Only when we truly humble ourselves, can we see Him also.

Journey Home

I have created this blog to be an incentive to organize my many meandering thoughts as well as an outlet for documenting my spiritual journey. My ultimate goal is to be conformed in the image of Jesus Christ. I am a Christian, and have been for most of my life, although I have only been seriously walking with Jesus for about 4 years or so.

I live in Rhode Island with my husband and 9 month old little boy, who I stay home and take care of.

I suppose I will reveal more of myself in my future posts, but that is basically the background information. I hope and pray that as God leads me through His many lessons, that He uses my experiences in your life, and your experiences in mine. Please feel free to comment, I will respond to all helpful and thoughtful comments.

Thanks for reading! God bless you all.